Random Nothingness

Nothingness. Loss. Writer's block. Forgetfulness...


Are these words similar to each other? To what degree?

I'm feeling a bit down lately in my mind's system. This is not emotionally, since I've been so cheery ever since Mirumo de Pon!'s 4th Season has yet again been aired to Philippine television, thanks to Hero TV (Sky Cable channel 44). Still, I can't help but become at a loss of ideas in my mind. I encountered forgetfulness, yet there are certain lines that were built while I was spending spare time looking at the ceiling's nothingness. Is this what they call the "writer's block"?

Setting aside that, things in Mirumo de Pon! are getting better for Katie and Dylan, yet are about to get complicated. It's the big irony. I've always, always, always imagined my life to become like hers. What an inevitable fantasy, still fantasizing... waiting... and waiting for me to have someone like Dylan. It's OBVIOUSLY elusive. Seen in Mirumo de Pon!'s story is all about love in many, different ways.

Love is such a banal thing for me. Everyone shows affection, but it blatantly shows that not everyone gets affection in return. Why does opportunity to be happy not for everyone?

I wonder what the logic behind everything in this world is...

Have you ever felt that you suddenly lost affection for someone?


No more happy feelings with simple thoughts of that person, no more smiles by the mere mentioning of his name. If there is such a feeling, can you force to experience this kind of feeling for someone you want to forget?

There are people you want and you feel more than want. Someone from your past that you still want. Years and years have passed, still, you actually LOVE the same person. You started to forget, to run away. You encounter someone else, still it has no effect. You can't seem to erase everything.

But the worst part is, HE HAS NOT YET entered your life. He's a mere person, not a stranger. You know him, he knows you. You secretly want to share something with him, the best things in life you can imagine.

Only if you can talk to him, if only, only he could hear your voice.

Sadly, the sarcasm of life remains. You have nowhere to run. If a new door opens, you hastily come in, but still, those feelings you found cannot compensate nor surpass every single feeling you want to leave behind. You don't want to hurt the person who shows you affection.

Is there any way you can get through?